


Mending New

by RebornFromSeas



Series: We all have monsters in our memories; some of us might be them still [3]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternat Perspective of Broken Implements, Caleb's in the background, Flirting with Canon Divergence, Fountain Pen enthusiasm, Gen, M/M, Molly has no idea what romantic attraction is like, Nott is so fucking hard to write, Random Tavern, The Denial is strong in Mollymauk, but oh boy, here's some proper Pining in denial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 00:52:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14842472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RebornFromSeas/pseuds/RebornFromSeas
Summary: Mollymauk feels like his thoughts on Caleb have been jumbled up and scrambled.  The only way he knows to move forward is to do good moving forward and apologize for past mistakes.  If he can get through the obstacles Caleb himself puts in the way.





	Mending New

**Author's Note:**

> Look, Look, this is important: Jester does not have perfect memory and neither does Mollymauk, So I didn't fact check certain things. I know, I know. but I needed a way to Get Molly to question certain things.

Jester stood from her chair and leaned over the table grinning, “And then! Molly insulted it to death! Its blood boiled and cracked its carapace!” 

Her audience – the two locals at the table – gasped and looked over to Molly, who laughed. The younger one – a girl - leaned in a bit, and with a breathlessly hushed voice asked, “Could you do that to one of us?”

Molly chuckled low and winked. “Not likely, you don’t have a carapace, after all.”

“Oh, we got paid by the King’s Hall in Zadash, but also, Caleb? He found a lot of coin on the corpses and gave it to me because we’d both had terrible days! Of course, I used it to pay our bills at the Tavern we were staying in, but –”

“Wait, he gave you the money? When did he do that?” Molly fixed his gaze on Jester.

Jester scrunched up her nose and shook her head. “I don’t remember! Before we left the sewers, I think? He pulled me aside!”

Molly nodded and leaned back in his chair. “Have I told you yet about my magic swords?” he started in, letting his usual bullshit flow. He put as much panache as he could into it, to keep Jester giggling and the locals quiet as he switched his gaze to Caleb, even if he could only really see the back of his head and set of his shoulders. Molly hadn’t talked to him since being told the wizard’s past last night. Just as well perhaps, hearing it had thrown out what he’d understood of Caleb. Had planted the idea that Caleb, like Molly, knew what it was like to be a monster – To have really, truly been a monster inhabiting their own skin and to force themselves to change towards something new.

And now, thanks to Jester, Molly also had to admit that assuming Caleb was taking all the gold for himself back in Zadash’s sewer might have been utterly wrong. Fantastic. He was feeling like an ass now for that confrontation. He had no way to fix that at the moment, he could apologize but interrupting Caleb’s studies was pointless. 

Molly took in the wizard again, then started winding his story down and shifted his attention back to Jester and the two locals enough to answer the questions shining in the girl’s eyes. He had a feeling she knew he was just spitting out another story he’d made up, but found it entertaining enough to poke at it. Fine with him, it was fun to lean into and answer her questions, until she was giggling as badly as Jester.

For a moment, once the giggling subsided, it was quiet in the tavern. Quiet enough that Beau’s voice drifted over with a weird note of apology – “…uh, looks like you've mangled that pen.” Followed by Caleb’s soft swearing about it being his only one.

Jester started telling the locals about how the Mighty Nein met Kiri and came to be her guardians for now. Molly didn’t pay attention, suddenly caught up by an idea. “Jester, I’m going to go get something, now that I’ve finished my breakfast.” She gave an absent nod and he stood. He was going to get more pens for Caleb. As an apology it was perfect, something useful enough that Caleb wouldn’t insist it was a waste of money.

He’d seen a store with stationary in passing, it just might have pens that Caleb could use. He paused, before he left the tavern, and wove his way to Nott. “Nott, quick question, Caleb needs special inks and paper to study his spells – Does he need special pens?”

Nott blinked up at him then got a sly look in her yellow eyes as she sipped from her flask. “I’ll tell you if you tell me why you’re getting them.”

“I just over heard that he damaged his, but it’s an apology,” He holds up his hand, quickly, “for a conversation I had specifically with him. I might owe you one as well, once I figure it out, but I accused him of something he didn’t do and got in his space to do it.”

Nott continued to look at him, and he couldn’t quite read her expression with that damn doll mask in place, but she must have been deciding if he was lying. She finally nodded, “Alright then. The pen doesn’t need to be special.”

“Thank you, darling,” Molly grinned and darted forward with a quick kiss to her forehead. He darted away immediately as Nott started swatting at him. He laughed and danced his way to the door and out onto the street. Now, where was that shop? 

Mollymauk drifted vaguely on the path they'd taken into town last night and hummed out of time songs to himself. It was inevitable that he started thinking about Caleb again, but he hadn’t noticed his thoughts drifting in that direction until his own fingers brushed the spot where – Well, Caleb surely hadn’t kissed him on the forehead. The door had opened for one thing. And yet just the thought of Caleb bending over to offer such physical affection for comfort sent longing through Molly. It was stupid, ridiculous. Caleb wasn’t the type to express affection like that with the type of – alliance? Friendship? – they currently shared. Molly wasn’t Nott, or as young as Kiri, or even so intimate that he could expect that sort of comfort from Caleb Widogast. He wasn’t even sure he wanted any relationship like that.

Never mind that there’d been something inexplicable about the wizard that had drawn Molly’s attention time and again. The obvious pain of his past, or the loyalty between him and Nott that reflected Molly’s own friendship with Yasha, or perhaps it was the fact that dirt could only do so much to disguise the fact that Caleb was handsome, could be handsome with food in him. 

No, he decided as he rounded a corner and finally spotted the stationary store, it was just a combination of attraction and his own preference for physicality that made him long for it, and the intimacy and fact that Caleb had a bad habit of holding onto useful magical items instead of articulating why he was afraid of them that put Molly off of actually pursuing anything.

Mollymauk stepped into the store and amended the last, Caleb was getting better at explaining his reasons, He’d certainly tried after he set things in motion with Calianna and the bowl. If he’d just communicated before he asked them to join in… He shook that of and smiled his best smile at the shopkeep. “what kinds of pens do you sell here?”

“The usual quills, nib pens for ink wells and, oh! We have these new fountain pens! You fill a reservoir in the pen itself instead of needing to do it in. It makes more consistent strokes.” He gave a wide grin, “would you like a demonstration?”

“Absolutely, that sounds lovely.”

In just moments, Molly was wholly caught up in the short demonstration of how to fill the fountain pen, what writing with it was like, what tuning the nibs meant, how too change the nibs, everything. Molly was genuinely fascinated, particularly by the concept of Caleb’s quick fingers doing all the care for a pen like this.

“And will it work for recording spells?”

The shopkeep frowned, then nodded, “yes, I’d say the only important thing there would be the make sure the pen is completely cleaned before you fill it with the better ink. I'll show you how to do that, and then if you want a pen like this, I'll sell you one I haven’t used for demonstrations.”

“Excellent, please do, and if there's written instructions as well? It's a gift.” Molly grinned, and the shop keeper have him a look that said he was slipping into something more carnie than polite. He didn't wince, or cringe, he was used to this, but he did nod for the shopkeep to get on with it. Another ten minutes passed, and Mollymauk left the shop with two fountain pens, extra nibs, and a beautiful rosewood and velvet case to hold them. Perfect, the items were more than Caleb would get on his own, but theoretically useful enough that Caleb would accept. 

He grinned and started walking back to the Tavern when Nott waved him down and joined him. “Can I see what you got him?”

Molly hesitated for a just a moment, but it was Nott and these were for Caleb, so he handed her the case. “Sure, what do you think?”

Nott handled the wood gingerly, careful with her own claws, and popped it open, “Oh, I want him to have these, I really do, but Molly…”

That sent warning bells clanging in his head, “Yeeeessss?” 

“He’s going to think it’s out of pity, you know? He might have said that he and I can have nice things, but he still avoids anything too nice.”

Molly stopped walking. “Really?”

“Really-really.” Nott nodded as she closed the case and handed it back to Molly, “He told me what he’d been doing when he came back. Um, last night, after talking to you.”

Molly frowned, not at the fact that she knew he knew, of course she did, but at there sincerity of her confirmation. “There goes my plan to leave it as a surprise for him. I’ll write a note or something.” Molly tucked the case away and sighed. Maybe if he waited a week as well? And then he realized something. “Why exactly are you being helpful in this? You don’t have any reason to like me and a have quite a few reasons to make things difficult for me.”

“Um, well. Caleb’s decided to trust you, for one thing. You don’t pity him and want to get him things he deserves, and if you wanted to get such things for me I wouldn’t trust you at all! But for Caleb?” Nott let her words hang.

Molly nodded, “For Caleb, yes, I think we’d both put aside our issues for him.” Mollymauk found himself amused at the sudden thought that Nott also knew what it feels like to be a monster, even if it was just skin deep for her. She was good, wanted to do good, in a way that said she never willingly committed harm on others. It was nice to think about for her. But that also reminded him of Fjords letter of recommendation to the Soltryce Academy. “Nott, I’m going to hazard a guess that you didn’t know Caleb’s history back when you tried to steal Fjord’s letter of recommendation?”

Nott nods furiously. “I don’t want it at all anymore! It won’t help him at all! Or any of us!”

Molly made a noise of agreement. “One of these days I think, the four of us who know need to consider what to do about that letter, you know, eventually.”

Nott hissed to herself, nearly growled something Molly couldn’t make out, then spoke more clearly, “I’m not sure what I want to do. He plays around with Jester and the way he treats Kiri! I like him less than I like you, and if Caleb had asked me before he told you, I would have told him to tell Yasha or Jester first!”

He laughed, he couldn’t help it. “I never would have expected Caleb to tell me. I’m honored, honestly. And Fjord… Well, my concern at this point is that if he pursues it, he’ll drag us along.”

“Fuck. I suppose we will need to figure something out.” Nott looked at the ground as they walked back to the tavern. 

Molly reached the door first and opened it for Nott, who went in, he looked around and noticed a definitely lack of Caleb. Molly blinked, looking around, and noted that most of the people who’d been there earlier had dispersed. He debated a moment longer, then headed back to Jester. “Jester, sweetheart, do you know where Caleb went?”

“Molly! Done with your errand? Caleb went upstairs to continue working on his spells after I fixed his pen for him!”

“Oh –” Molly bit down on his disappointment and forced a grin, “Good, Hey Jester? Can you hold onto a surprise I got for him?” He pulled out the case and looked to her fantastic pink haversack.

Jester grinned back, “Sure! But why do you need me to hold onto it?”

“I need to write a note for it, and your bag is pretty secure in terms of well, even peeking inside you don’t really see anything past whatever the surface object is.”

Jester laughed, then grinned wider, “Are you surprising him with it because you liiiike him?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, dear, I like all of you.”

Jester pouted, “you might not be lying when you say that, but you do like him more.”

“That’s also not what you asked,” Molly grinned wider, “But would you?”

“Yes, yes. Show me want you got him.”

Mollymauk handed over the case, Jester looked it over quickly, saw the two pens inside, and slipped them into one of the side pockets, then looked back to him with wide eyes. “Molly – You really do like more don’t you?”

He sighed, then gave a shrug, “I’m still sorting out if that’s true or not. Thank you though, dear. Oh! And remind me to write a note to go with that later, if you will. I want to go do something.” Molly clasped his hands over hers quickly, then let go and headed upstairs. He wanted to speak to Caleb, perhaps, if he could get just a few moments alone.


End file.
